Always Positive? 8

‘Are they always positive?’ This is the question I ask myself so now and then when I think on all this positive lifestyle gurus. ‘Are they never ever struggling in life?’ This would be the second most upcoming question when I think on them.

You see, I guess, we both know the answers to these questions:

  • No, they are not always positive.
  • Yes, they also struggle with things. Just like you and me.

There is no wizardry or magic involved, but as they following their own techniques they will overcome negativity and struggling faster.

I’m not a guru, but pretty much positive. This positivity brings a certain responsibility with it. Especially if you share it with other people on a blog and try to motivate them to become positive too. Or, if they already are positive, to share it with the people around them. What I mean with this responsibility thing is this: how can I tell someone how to be positive, when I’m not positive myself. It’s the same like telling others exactly how to repair their car without being able to do it myself.

However, I have to confess that I am not positive all the time. I struggle and have negative thoughts just like everybody. Sometimes it feels like I’m standing besides myself, just like on the picture above. Luckily I almost immediately take notice of it and do my best to change it on the spot when I recognize it. So now and then I need to be attended on the fact that I’m thinking and acting against my own rules.

In the last days when I was struggling, my girlfriend told me that I’m focusing on the negative things instead of the positive. Normally I would tell her this.

Isn’t it a contradiction not to follow the rules you recommend others?

I remember a case where Paul McKenna was sued by a weirdo who’s girlfriend insisted that he had become insane after a stage hypnosis, performed by Paul. Though McKenna won the trial as it could be proofed that this is impossible and the guy was out of his mind before he joined the show. Paul McKenna stated that this was a very annoying experience for him. Just like someone is pulling the floor away under his feet and he’s falling into a deep hole. He said that he was able to help other people but wasn’t able to help himself. It was very hard for him. You see, also a self help guru can struggle.

I am sure you’ve had comparable experiences in your life. Not that it had to end in a trial, but I’m sure you found yourself in situations where you have helped others out of an annoying situation. No matter how. It could have been with a nice talk, with giving someone shelter or whatever. I’m also sure that you found yourself helpless when you were in such a situation yourself. Where you was the one who needed the talk or helping hand. This would have been a moment of self doubt for you. The moment where you think Shit, how can I give someone good advice, when I don’t even can give myself good advice?

Rest assured that this is normal. A negative thought has it’s importance. It attends you on the fact that something is wrong and has to be fixed. You can compare this with pain. The pain your broken arm sends to your brain reminds you to see a doctor. OK, this example is a little awkward but it’s nonetheless true.

There are even positive thoughts that can create negative feelings. I come back on this soon.

Have a nice weekend and thanks for your visit.

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8 thoughts on “Always Positive?

  • Ilaria/Swimturtle

    Mario, this is very true. Everyone has negative feelings and it’s also true that negative feelings can lead to positive outcomes. The most important lesson to lean here, perhaps, is that it is important to be able to take a step back from oneself and ask: why am I having these feelings, and what can I do to change them? And that is the beginning of fixing the problem or healing the feelings. Sometimes it’s as simple as letting go of something you wanted to be different but have no power to change. If you have no power to change it, accept it and move on. If you do, then change it. And otherwise, ask yourself if you really wanted it. Sometimes we think we want things and it turns out we’re better off without them. Listen to yourself and what your mind and body are telling you, and you’ll always land on your feet…
    Thanks for this great post! And I LOVE THE PICTURE!

  • shea

    I however do like the sound of Mario Live Guru, although not as a name for your blog, maybe a title for your book that you are writing.
    I really like the picture. How did you do that?
    Also, since I had to have my hair cut very short today, I was noticing your hair and I think it looks great, especially with the pony tail.
    Rock on, Mario, Rock on.

    • Mario Post author

      This sounds funny, but your right, not as a blog’s name.

      The foto: I mounted my camera on a tripod and made three different pictures. In Photoshop I loaded them each on different layer. The next step was removing all the differences between picture 1 and 2. The second step was removing the differences between picture 2 and 3. After that I flattened the layers and I was done. I find it pretty amusing to do.

      The hair: One of the things I wanted to try before I die, was growing my hair. Normally I was always the short haired guy. Once I had a bald head for a week (another thing I wanted to try before I die). My hair is growing fast. However, at some point it seems to stop growing and that means that you have a bad hair day for a couple of weeks or even month. Usually that was the point for me to give up the long hair project. But not this time. Finally I came over the urge to cut it and now I let it grow. It’s possible that I’m going to cut again one day. When the time has come I make sure to video tape it and put it on this blog.

  • Ulrich

    This is an interesting question. I think that people need to be negative sometimes to tell others how to become positive. This may sound strange, but I mean, if you are always positive you will forget how you became positive, you will forget how it felt being negative. But you need this knowledge in order to find solutions for the problems of other people (and you, of course). It’s also about being authentic.

    • Mario Post author

      You are right, Ulrich and it’s not strange actually. Because, if you don’t know the opposite how can you know how it feels? It would be as authentic as telling somebody about a beautiful place to go on holiday, without having been there oneself. That would be strange.

  • ZuzannaM

    Hello Mario~

    I like the question about positive attitude in a human life.
    Do not think that we are a miracle people, all of us, there might be some days that we are a bit down so the positive can be suppress. I loved the blog and your fabulous picture!

    That picture speaks more then a thousand words ~ thank you!

    Great blog,

    • Mario Post author

      Thank you, Zuzanna

      I think indeed that we need this little dips to recognize the nice things in life. At least as long as the dips are not too deep.
      The picture was fun to make.

      Have a nice day!